Nothing in my life has turned out how I expected it to. Really, nothing. My interpretation of God’s plan and the reality of His plan are two completely different things. So also, our definitions of trust are vastly different. I expect certain things from God, and I am in the wrong to do so. The assumptions I anticipate regarding His plans for my life are wonderful and lovely things, things that I imagine God desiring for me, things… that never happen. I step back from another “one of those days” with fragments of hope gathered in my hands, awfully confused. Why not, Lord? Why not this? Why wouldn’t you want this for me? I thought I knew You; I thought I understood You. Then my utmost Father sits me down, and with every gentleness and love in His heart, He adds some insight.
His desire is to fulfill the very essence of my prayer, without necessarily granting that which I am in that moment asking. His knowledge of me exceeds my own. He sees more than I can see. He understands what is yet to come. In my oblivious humanity, I cannot fathom anything better than what is before my eyes. Time and time again I refuse to trust that there could ever be anything greater, because it feels safer not to. Why should I give God the chance to let me down? That wouldn’t look good on Him. How mistaken I am with every facet of my thinking. How sad is my desperate reluctance to trust Him. There isn’t a single occasion when God will fail me. He won’t; guaranteed. He is a God of love. He takes care of His children, and His children we are. Though unexpected, His plans are foolproof. So throw expectation out the window. Live without it; you don’t need it. Trust in the Lord with your whole heart; He knows what to do with it.
None of the rulers of this age understood this; for if they had, they would not have crucified the Lord of glory. But, as it is written, “What no eye has seen, nor ear heard, nor the human heart conceived, what God has prepared for those who love him”—these things God has revealed to us through the Spirit; for the Spirit searches everything, even the depths of God.
–Corinthians 2: 8-10