To Every Guy Who’s Ever Wondered:
I think there has been a lot of misunderstanding. Everywhere I look, I see headlines and cover stories telling me all I never knew I wanted in a guy; none of it true. I find it ironic to pick up a magazine claiming to represent me as a female, only to discover that I disagree with nearly every item on the list of traits I supposedly find appealing in men. Magazines are notorious for offering to think and speak for us; providing the most up-to-date generalizations they can squeeze into a Top 10. And if we’re not buying into that glossy-paged misrepresentation, chances are we’ve resorted to the phrase, “Women don’t know what they want”. But I disagree, because that’s not the whole story.
Are we satisfied with nothing less than a GQ physique, six-figure paycheck, and a debonair presence comparable to that of the Old Spice guy? Sounds pretty nice, but women are lying to themselves if they say that’s all it takes. Question her further and you’ll see it in her eyes; she’ll never be satisfied with that man if he can’t make her feel known.
Back in high school, did we judge Prom night by a photo on the fridge or by the experience we had? “My date was rude, couldn’t hold a conversation, never asked me to dance, and ditched me for another group of friends. But he’s hot and everyone likes that photo of us! So it was a great night!” These are words you’ll never hear her say. Women look for people whose company they can actually enjoy. No woman aspires to find a man she can merely tolerate. What women really want… is one thing.
Women want to be convinced.
Guys have been receiving hand-me-down tips from veteran bachelors who tell them to flaunt their accomplishments, challenge her with indifference, and flatter her with unoriginal and empty compliments; meanwhile, she can see right through it. There were many men before you who confused us, distracted us, and misled us. Now we’re not so easily convinced. Sometimes, because of this, we become harder to get to know; but, lucky for you, we take love more seriously. We no longer have time for the attention-seeking men of our youth who won’t take life seriously; the men who speak only of themselves without asking about you; the men who would rather avoid hard work than make a difference. Instead, we’re looking for the men who are perceptive enough to form at least one honest compliment we can believe. We want the men who can inspire themselves to try again, and then actually have the willpower to follow through. We want men who are ready to embrace their full potential, instead of planning to acknowledge it one day. This, my friends, is what women want.
Women want a man to convince them that love is real, not by their logic, but by their presence. We don’t lie awake at night praying for a guy to come along and tell us what we want to hear; we pray for a man who will be able to awaken in us a cause to become more of ourselves. A man whose involvement can offer a basis with which to notice things we’ve never known before. She wants a reason to believe you’re different, and right now you have the opportunity to be that for her.
When you devote your lifestyle to pursuing qualities of enduring value, your heart will experience a peace it never knew possible. Be the man your potential allows you to be, and you’ll realize in the end, that’s all we ever wanted.