People are a joy and their company a gift. I speak not out of naivete but out of discovery and love. I am no stranger to the resentful businessman, the surly pedestrian, or the ungrateful neighbor; neither are grief or suffering unfamiliar to me. Yet, I recognize the loneliness hiding in the cynicism, the heartache within the indignation, and the desperate cry for love within every unjustified complaint. Recognizing it as I do, how can I return insult with insult? Our similarities are astounding. How much more then do I desire to love the stranger when I begin to recognize him as brother.
More often than not, I cannot hear God; and more often than not, I’m frustrated by that. But it’s not so much about hearing Him as it is about noticing Him and understanding Him. If faith were dependent upon hearing God, few of us would have a fighting chance. We’re not guaranteed to hear Him, and neither do we need to. God doesn’t tell me very much, but He does give me the most meaningful glances. Sometimes one look says more than words ever could, and that is the essence of how God and I communicate. When I am in pain, and there are no words accurate enough for how I feel, my soul turns to Him with a look that says it all, and He understands. In reply, He offers me the most compassionate gaze, one so tender and intimate that it is almost a physical embrace. When I am exhausted and frustrated, and God cannot get a word in edgewise from all of my complaining; my soul looks to Him with a reluctant sort of surrender. He, in turn, gazes back into my soul, eyes full of love, as a Father Who knows that His little girl has no idea how much He loves her. A picture is only worth a thousand words, but the eyes of the Holy One speak for days.
Our hatred for vulnerability is the very thing that exposes our true weakness. Fear. It is a delusion to mistake stoicism for strength. A hardened heart is the epitome of cowardice, for what strength is there in hiding? To starve your heart and suffocate your emotions is to elect fear as your tyrant. Authentic strength is found when we embrace the risk that is vulnerability. When we confess the desires we’ve long subdued, therein lies opportunity. How can our doubts have any weight if we won’t allow the Lord a chance to prove Himself? Only through the exhaustive surrender of our identity and our plans can the Lord purify them to truly satisfy our soul.
I consider your attention here a compliment in itself. You are about to stumble upon a simple collection of thoughts that I would otherwise keep close; however, to my surprise, I’ve been encouraged to share them with a wider audience. If, by happy coincidence, you happen to appreciate what I think about, stay tuned. You are now counted among the friends I share my thoughts with. My hope is that you delight with me in the intrigue, fascination, and wonder of life.
May you be blessed,